never good enough. so sorry i cant be happy 24/7.
so, im back from the hk holiday.back to the semi hectic life,
the one where i havta try n fit in with everyone, despite my insecurities, inadequacies, sense of self.
how do u get comfortable in ur own skin, when, ure constantly reminded tht ure just nt good enough.
the boyfriend is back,
and i guess its reassuring to know hes physically around.
we both have grown,
but its sad,
sad tht we arent around, wasnt around, cant be around to witness and share that stage of growth.
for now im just glad that hes back,
cause theres always tht sense of small inner happiness seeing him fall asleep.
sumtimes i get sick of the hard times,
sumtimes its dandy, and i think its ok,
but small moments bring an instantaneous, tinge of heartwrench tht disappears in my memories when the days drone on.
how do we know what we really want,
when u never really experienced what u think u want.
i dont think i can eva accept myself for who i am totally, cause
its never seems good enough
for anyone.
wldnt it be nice if u cld do sth really well, and tht consumes ur personality and then it gets settled, so u can hold onto tht sth to know who u are.
so who are those u cant live without.
and who are those u really need.
and why m i drifting apart.
hell yea i know im not the person with the best communicating skills, or socialising skills eva, so where do i stand.
how can i find a standing ground.
and when will i find wad i m looking for.
or for heavens sake, at least let me find peace with myself.
